Typing the title of this entry suddenly remind myself that im the miss taiwan justin always jokingly associates me with. Was called miss taiwan because of my excitement to visit taiwan during the school excursion and I kept talking about it. It got cancelled and I doubt I can ever see some of the beautiful scenary I so looked forward to then.

Just saw the taiwan's news channel. It's so saddening. Everywhere was ruined. Lives lost, crops damaged, homeless, ragged and scarred hearts that may never recover to become a whole again. So many scenes where the taiwaneses kneeled down to plead for help. So many scenes where they are so hopeless and can only keep crying to relieve their sadness from within. And some distance away, I was so comfortably at home, eating beancurd, watching television, feeling their grieve.

Feel so helpless. It's as if I feel that I can help but I dunno what I can help. As I poured away the unfinished curry away, I thought about how many it could feed to the victims of the flood. So wasted but could do nothing. I suddenly has this thought of becoming a volunteer after I finish my studies and everything. Made what I learnt useful. Do some services to the world. But reality is if I become a volunteer, there wouldnt have be enough income to feed myself, much less my parents. I see my decision stopped by my mum. Cause I know her too well that she will stop me using 101% methods. And I wasnt sure if I have enough courage to break away from all normality life like working, marriage and taking care of household. Because im a normal family girl. This type of people have high reliance on family and will homesick easily. Such a weakling.

How to put thoughts into practical? This is a question.

~~Emo Emo~~