Since very very long ago, I had started to dread doing FYP. I think it's not the first time I said this. I hate being a leader. I hate I hate I hate... I believe all my group members think im so damn incompetent. For the past 20 years, this is the first time I heard of Microsoft Project which freaking hell can make a gantt chart out. And I used a Microsoft word. I think this post is turning into an anger post any moment when I continue. I hope nobody is going to be offended by what I said. I know it's hard not to be offended but I really need some source to divert my unhappiness that had been bottling up for so long.

It's not that I didnt realise time is limited. In fact, I tried to say during the last meeting. But everybody said we sure can finish on time. Not that I doubt anybody's capability but im really unhappy when you all just shoot me and said I am not urgent at all. Im just so sick of being said why boss this, why boss that even I know that they are meant to be jokes. But you know, sometimes jokes can carry too far, carry too long until they lost the meaning of funny and end up being irritating. So so tired of having my ideas rebound back with everybody standing at one line and im like the baddy who's trying to ruin the life by assigning impractical jobs. I am particularly fed up when I heard you asked "You all haven do Analysis?" Are you not belonging to the "you all"?? I dunno if you all know that I hate hearing "whichever, whichever makes you happy." Because im definitely not happy. The project is ours. It's not I want to do this, I want to do that. I hate forcing. If doing any job is that unwilling, I will be very willing to take any job on my own. Sure it's funny the first few times it was used. But not anymore.

Im so sorry for being so incompetent. I just dunno how to lead. Afterall, it's the first time I try to. And im so sorry for making anybody angry after reading. I just wanna shoot everything out before I can really continue. Bottling up is hard.